Had to Laugh

I've been working hard this week to get the temporary ABC license for the neighborhood auction / party. I had been working with a guy named Cameron in Raleigh at the ABC Board, a sweetheart who clearly understands this ol' broad has never done this before and is definitely not having a party that will present a problem to the local authorities.

Monday night, I was online checking the requirements one more time when I noticed a footnote to the effect that ABC applications are due 15 days before the event. Erk. Rewind. At that point, the event was a mere 12 days away. Their office was closed so the only logical thing I could do was to stay wide awake all night until I could call first thing Tuesday morning. Laughing, Cameron said no, I did not have to have it in 15 days in advance -- I had until the Thursday just prior to the event. I insisted that I would get the thing fed-ex'ed on Wednesday -- I needed my sleep.

So I hustled it on Tuesday to get all the components together to send off. Here is what I had to get:

• Neighborhood bylaws
• List of neighborhood board members
• {these show we're a legitimate homeowners' association, even though we are not 501(c)3}
• Letter from owner of bldg saying we have permission to have the party there
• Occupancy certificate from fire marshal
• Letter with raised seal from courthouse affirming I have a clear criminal record
• My signature with notary affirming I am >21 and otherwise comply with their requirements
• Diagram of the building showing all exits and where the bar will be
• Letter explaining the purpose of the fundraising event
• ~I also included a copy of the park plans to show it really does exist
• Signature of policeman saying they have no issues with our having a party w/alcohol at this location

On Wednesday I gladly took this 1/2 inch package to Office Depot, made copies in case it got lost, and sent it next-day-air to the ABC Board in Raleigh. Whew. Sigh of relief.

Yesterday, I got up early and made supper for DS1 and his wife & baby. They recently moved from NYC to Nearby Large City and I had not made it over there to see the house, help unpack, hold baby, or anything. Both their cell phones direct me to Voice Mail, have for a week now, and I am feeling rather excluded. So I prepared a supper for them and drove the hour to their house.

While I was on the road, my cell phone rang. It was the lady at ABC Board who reviews these applications. "Maggie," she said, "I got your package..."

"Good, good!!" I replied. Yelling into speakerphone as we are not supposed to talk on cell phones anymore, I think. Can't find the "new law" online but it is rumored to be in effect.

"Everything seems to be in order..." she said.

"Great! That's what I wanted to hear!" I yelled.

"...Except for the $50 money order to pay for your license..."

doh. Silence on my end. Followed by hysterical, maniacal, laughter.

"Well, thank you for letting me know. And thank you for not calling me a big, fat, dummy. I'll send it first thing tomorrow."

So. It's almost 9 now. Going to the bank, then to Office Depot....again.