Guns and Barbies

As a young mom, I made many mistakes. One in particular I remember is forbidding my children to have the things I didn't believe in.

The two boys were only 16 months apart. I did not allow them to have toy guns. It seemed at every birthday party, they would receive at least 2 or 3 toy guns. It was very frustrating. After the guest had gone, while the boys were distracted, I would slip the guns out of the room and hide them on top of the refrigerator until I could get them into the outside garbage can.

They were both fascinated with the concept of guns. Everything became a gun. Sticks in the yard, half-eaten sandwiches, stacks of Legos, anything that could remotely resemble a gun, became one. Bang, you're dead.

Finally I gave up. Once they were allowed to have them, the fascination seemed to wane. I still wonder, though, is that why DS2 joined the armed forces?

I was also opposed to the Barbie doll. Her physical perfection seems impractical to me. Does she have a good personality? A sense of humor? Is she sensitive? Smart? Self-reliant? I became anti-Barbie.

And so my daughter craved them. Being a cheap gift, she received scads of them as birthday gifts. They disappeared, similarly to the guns. She loved to go next door and play with the little girl whose mom encouraged Barbies. I distinctly remember the mom next door, out in the front yard at night with a flashlight, looking for a missing Barbie shoe.

Do you know how small a Barbie shoe is? It's not quite a half-inch long. By maybe a quarter-inch wide. Why on earth did she even know it was missing? I never understood.

Finally, I relented and let DD have Barbies.

By the time I raised LO, I was a wee bit older and wiser. Still opposed to Barbies, I allowed her to have them, but did not encourage them. When we played with them, I would say things like, this is her college interview outfit, this is what she wears to help at the shelter.

LO soon tired of Barbies and they languished in their box until I finally had her permission to throw them away.