Biography

My first article for a glossy magazine runs in December. My deadline was 08.September and in true form I sent it in on 05.September, after having had the assignment for 3 months. Don't ask me why I sat on it for 3 months; I do not know. I wish I understood it, myself. 

Since sending it in we have had a flurry of emails regarding edits, (very minor), photographs, whom to call at the location, and finally today, an email requesting a 1-2 line bio. 

I pulled out an old issue of this magazine; their Christmas issue from last year, in fact, and looked at the bios in there to get an idea of what they might want. 

Mary Poole Smith lives in Bath.

Katherine Jones is a freelance writer who lives in Charlotte. 

Diane Winthrop-Butler lives in Raleigh. 

These are writers, and this is the best they can come up with?

Here is one I really liked:

Award-winning newspaper columnist and freelance writer Jimmy Thompson lives in Greensboro. 

Hmm. I need to self-promote here, but I haven't won any awards, yet, unless we can count junior high school. I don't think we can count junior high school. 

I want to be clever. I want to make the reader smile. I want people to call and beg me to write for them; my article was fine but that bio! was so...clever. 

Maggie's Attic loves to jump on dead leaves and decide what breakfast cereal they sound like.

Maggie's Attic is a freelance writer who still cleans the john and picks drawers up off the floor. 

Maggie's Attic walks for most of her errands but drives an inordinate amount of miles just getting LO from one place to the other. 

Hmm. Still working on it...